This registry came about after several mothers in our organization coincidentally learned that they had used the same donor and that their children were half-siblings. It is probable that this situation is going to become more, rather than less, common as the supply of donors is fairly limited, and the number of children conceived by donor insemination is growing.
Similar to the way adoption agencies help adopted children to find their biological parents, interested parents can register their child's name, sex, and date of birth, along with the donor's ID number and the name and address of the sperm bank used, in a confidential Sibling Registry database that will be maintained by SMC.
Our files do not have any information on the donor except that which was given to the parent, i.e., his number and the name of the sperm bank at which he made his sperm donation. All the information in the registry is completely confidential. No one other than the SMC staff has access to the information, except the parent and the child (once s/he is over 18).
We are currently registering children and giving their parents the following options, from most minimal to most inclusive:
1. Parents can register and elect not be told if there is a donor match, nor to let the other parent know. In that case, we merely hold the information should a future need arise or should the parent change their mind at a later time or until the child is over age 18 and requests the information.
2. Parents can register and ask to be notified if there is a match but not to receive specific information about the other parents.
3. Parents can register and ask for specific information about the other family.
4. Parents can register and ask that both parent(s) be notified if there is a match.
The Sibling Registry is open to any parents whose child was conceived through donor insemination, both members and nonmembers of SMC, single and married. The registry is a free service to members of Single Mothers by Choice. Nonmembers can register their child in the Sibling Registry for a minimal fee. About 10 percent of those registered have found a match.
You can request a form by sending an e-mail to smc-office@pipeline.com or calling the SMC office at (212) 988-0993.
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